Good Bye, 2020. Hello, 2021!
There is no simple way to sum up, the year 2020. Tumultuous, terrifying, wearisome. In 2019 at this time, it was doubtful any of us would have readily agreed to all the challenges that the new year, 2020, would bring. We’ve been confronted with creating and adapting to new ways of learning, working, and living our lives amid stressors that we have never experienced before. A drizzle became a monsoon. But for all the hardship the new year ushered in, 2020 has also provided a unique opportunity to reflect. Its lessons are many. Here are a few that rise to the surface for us - resilience, creativity, hope, and gratitude.
Let’s look ahead.
When people want to change something in their lives, they often start at a temporal milestone. Psychologists refer to this as the fresh-start effect. The most significant temporal milestone of them all, however, is the beginning of a new year. It’s that time of year when people make their New Year’s resolutions —indeed, 93 percent of people set them, according to the American Psychological Association.
Welcoming the new year may feel a bit different this year, given the challenges of 2020 and the inability to celebrate together. For many people, this puts a greater focus on long-term goals than their busy lives usually allow. For others, common New Year’s resolutions focus on behavior changes expecting positive outcomes regarding physical and mental health. Increasing the likelihood of people succeeding with their New Year’s resolutions could benefit the individual and society.
Surprisingly, 45 percent of people fail to keep their resolutions by February, and only 19 percent keep them for two years. Lack of willpower or self-control is the top-cited reason for not following through, recent research indicates. Life-changing commitments are just hard to commit. If most people can’t stay at it for six weeks, something must be wrong with the whole process. How can you increase your willpower and fulfill your New Year’s promise to yourself? How can you nudge yourself in the direction you'd like to go? Here are a few strategies, based on scientific evidence, to help you create long-lasting change:
Be clear about your goals and values.
Ask yourself why this goal matters to you. Do you want to lose weight because you value getting in shape to return to a favorite pastime of hiking, or because of societal expectations and pressures? People who are guided by their authentic values are better at achieving their goals. They also don’t run out of willpower because they perceive it as a limitless resource. Figure out what makes you tick and choose plans consistent with those values.
Resolutions work best when they are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound. If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Be realistic about what you can do. Please keep it simple and be precise. Most long-term change happens slowly, so identify small changes that you can make successfully. Change is a process, not an event.
Frame positively
Focus on what you want to accomplish, not what you don’t. Instead of planning not to drink alcohol on weekdays during the new year, commit to drinking your favorite sparkling water with Sunday to Thursday evening meals. Struggling to suppress thoughts takes a lot of energy, and they have a way of returning to your mind with a vengeance. It also helps to reflect on the aspects of yourself and your life that you are already happy with. Although you might fear that this will spur complacency and inaction, studies show that gratitude and other positive emotions lead to better self-control in the long run.
Control what you can control
Restructure your environment. Research suggests that people with high willpower are exceptionally good at arranging their environment to avoid temptations. Although we love ice cream, we don’t have any in our freezers. Supportive friends and family can dramatically increase the chances of success. Joining a group whose members practice behaviors you’d like to adopt is another excellent way to bolster your willpower because having role models improves self-control.
Have the ‘if-then’ strategy
Do not get angry with yourself if you fail. Change is a journey. Setbacks are to be expected and are part of the learning process. Forgive yourself and reflect on what happened. Think through the barriers to achieving your goal and try again. Even the best resolution falls apart when your busy schedule and exhaustion take over. Formulate a series of backup plans to handle obstacles when they present themselves. These ‘if-then’ plans improve self-control and goal attainment. Each time you wake up in the middle of the night craving candies or chips, you can eat an apple slowly and mindfully, savoring each bite. When you’re tired, and about to skip that gym class you signed up for, call your supportive sibling who is on standby. Anticipate as many situations as possible and make specific plans, vividly imagining the problems and what you will do at the moment.
Be gentle and realistic.
Small steps move you forward to your ultimate goal. Avoid taking on too much too quickly. When you embark on a new pursuit, start small and build on early successes. Use one less spoonful of sugar in your coffee. Eventually, you might be able to forgo any sweeteners at all. If resisting that muffin proves too hard, try waiting 10 minutes. By the end of it, your urge will likely subside. You might be surprised to realize that change in one domain of life tends to spread to other areas. You might find you can bike longer distances or moderate your caffeine intake more efficiently.
Be persistent
Remember, sticking to resolutions is hard, especially in the beginning. One 2016 study from the University of Chicago found that the most significant predictor people would keep to their long-term goals was whether they received an immediate reward. Delayed gratification just wasn’t much of a motivator. People swear they’re going to the gym for the health of their future self, but if they’re not enjoying it at the moment or seeing quick results, they tend to drop out. Those first few weeks of doing something new are almost always the worst. You’re unfit, unpracticed, and just unable to cope. Combine that with the often miserable January weather, post-holiday blues, and work stress, and almost nobody is having any fun until at least St. Patrick’s Day.
Reward yourself
Picture the feeling of endorphins circulating through your body after a run or the sun on your skin as you approach the end of a hike. Pay attention to all five senses: smell, sight, hearing, touch, and taste. The imagery of rewards improves your chances of engaging in the activity that results in them. If it’s hard to imagine or experience these rewards initially, decide on small, meaningful gifts you can give yourself until the positive effects of the new behaviors kick in. For example, imagine yourself taking a break after finishing a project. Visualize what you would do and how you would feel, and then do it.
Self-compassion
It’s a common belief that the way to increase willpower is to ‘whip oneself into shape’ because being kind to oneself is indulgent and lacks self-discipline. But the exact opposite is true — people who harshly blame themselves for even small willpower failures tend to do worse in accomplishing their goals in the long run. Try self-compassion instead. Cut yourself some slack and remember that being human means being imperfect. When you fall for that doughnut, don’t despair, and don’t throw in the towel. Treat yourself with care and understanding, and then recommit to your goal the following day. Remember, you aren’t likely to achieve your New Year’s resolutions by being self-critical and hard on yourself. Instead, boost your willpower through a series of small and strategic steps that will help you succeed.
Start now
No marathon runner ever steps up to the start line in a big race without putting in the training miles. He or she has been practicing for months, if not years. It would help if you did the same with your New Year’s resolutions. It will make it much easier to stick to them. By starting now, you will get a much deeper understanding of what you’re resolving to do. It’s better to find out in December that a five-mile run is a bit optimistic for your current fitness level, so you can dial it back and start with two-mile runs in January. And to make sticking to your New Year’s resolution even more manageable, with a few weeks of occasional warm-up jogs, you won’t be starting from scratch on Jan. 1. You would already have gotten over the worst of the starting period. You might even be beginning to see results. If you’re planning to eat healthily in January, use the time to find meals that you love and that are easy to cook. If you want to write a journal, start now, and sticking to your resolution will already be part of your daily routine. Do not wait until the conditions are perfect to begin. Beginning makes the conditions perfect. Every moment is a fresh beginning.
What are your 2021 resolutions? Feel free to share in the comment section below. We wish you health, happiness, and peace in 2021! The best is yet to come.
References
Published 12/26/2020
Dr. Amar Singh, MD, and Dr. Poonam Singh, MD, are board-certified by the American Board of Internal Medicine and American Board of Obesity Medicine. They specialize in preventing, treating, and reversing chronic diseases using an evidence-based holistic approach. They are specifically interested in weight management, hormone re-balancing, and longevity. The American College of Physicians has recognized them as Fellows, FACP, for their excellence and contributions to medicine and the broader community. They enjoy teaching, volunteering, and advocating for their patients. Their mission is to share simple, effective, and proven strategies that lead to meaningful, sustainable, and long-lasting well-being.
